Tuesday, December 29, 2009

The one in which I use a lot of caps-locked phrases

It's 2:30 a.m. And I am awake.

I'm not all-too happy about it, either.

I took a vacation day today. For Christmas weekend. And what a vacation day it was. I think my head may explode from all the SIN AND DEATH inside it.

I just spent a half hour completely tearing both bathrooms and a nighstand apart, because OMG WHY DO WE NOT HAVE ANY NYQUIL IN THIS HOUSE!?

That's not really fair. We do have Nyquil. And Dayquil, and Tylenol Cold, and all kinds of other cold medicine. They just all expired in 2008 or earlier. As in, about two years ago.

Evidently we keep them as souvenirs. 

Gah. That can't be safe. But don't think for a second I didn't consider chugging that super-expired bottle of Nyquil, because I SO DID.

Fortunately, before I could break into said bottle of poison (or the liquor cabinet), Super-Husband offered to go to the store and get me da drugzzzz. Because even the Vicks Tissues weren't cutting it anymore. I KNOW. BLASPHEMY.

I'm pretty sure he was willing to do it for me because I am just so very sexy today. What with all the loud nose-blowing, pathetic moaning, unbrushed teeth, clown-red nose, pronouncing my "m's" and "n's" like "d's" or "b's," unwashed orange hair, and mouth breathing I've been doing today, WHO WOULDN'T WANT TO GO OUT OF HIS WAY FOR THIS!? Grrrrowwwl.

And on his way out the door I was like "Oh, honey, can you also get me green tea? You know, only if you see it." And he's like, "yes, sweetheart, anything for you." And I'm all "And honey! Honey for my green tea? You know, only if you happen to pass by it?" And he's like "Sure dear, anything for you."

Anything for me. Almost worth the "feeling like I'm going to die" thing.

I'm getting really great at this wallowing in self-pity thing. I think I may go professional soon.

Who am I kidding? I was always a professional at that.


Update: He ended up going to two different stores looking for the Advil Cold and Sinus, but since it was 2:30 a.m. and all, they wouldn't sell it to him since it was behind the pharmacy counter. When he came home, I told him he got "60 points" for trying, which he got extremely excited about and decided to cash them in right away to play his video game right now. (He's very serious about being assigned points for everything he does and keeping track of them. I don't have the heart to tell him that they're not actually real points.) He did bring Nyquil though, so I should be okay n...o.....w......zzzzzzzzzzzzz
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