Wednesday, January 19, 2011


I think that sometimes, God puts people in your life specifically to test your patience.

My husband is such a person.

But instead of patience, I usually go with flinging myself over the couch, face in a pillow, and moaning "Ugggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" really dramatically.

That's the same, right?

Just say "right."


My husband. He is good at lots of things. Taekwondo. Picking out really nice clothes. Dishes. Budgeting our money. Smelling amazing. Sales. Getting bottles of water from the garage fridge every night before we go to bed.

He's quite useful, that one.

But technology? Is not his friend. I think it's a generational thing. Sometimes my parents have trouble with technology too. It's hard for old people, I guess. So many buttons and lights. Buzzers and bells. It distracts them with its complexity and darn it if it doesn't make their hips and knees start to act up again.

So anyway, a few months ago, Jack saw a commercial for the Beatles collection on iTunes, and he looked at me excitedly and announced that he was so excited to get be getting an iPhone soon, because then he'll be able to download that collection from iTunes!

I just stared at him blankly.

"You're joking, right?" I responded.

"No!" he said, "I really like the Beatles!"

"No, I mean about iTunes," I replied, still sure that he was messing with me. "You know you can download stuff from iTunes if you don't have an iPhone, right?"

Jack's eyes widened.

"You can!?" he asked, gasping. "But... how would you listen to the songs?"

And then I had a stroke and died.

I finally got him all informed about the magical, magical world of purchasing, downloading, and either burning CDs (WHO KNEW!?) or loading music to a device, and it was then that I realized I would really have to keep an eye on my poor little technology-impaired friend.

"So, this is great! Now I can buy my CDs on iTunes and have them for my iPhone too!" he chattered excitedly.

"Wait. Buy your CDs on iTunes? Like, the CDs you already own?" I asked.

"Yeah!" he replied, still excited about the prospect of owning his music in a digital format.

And then we learned about CD ripping and digitizing. Oy. Have I mentioned that I am A BROADCASTING PROFESSIONAL? My heart. It hurts.

Anyway, we caught the music madness before anything stupid went down, and all was right with the world again, until tonight, when I realized that this taekwondo school purchase is going to make me a VERY, VERY TIRED PERSON.

"How do I change the logo in this Word document?" Jack asked me as he was trying to modify his student contract.

I showed him how to select the logo, then click on the little picture icon in the toolbar, and it would give him a browser window where he could replace the current logo with his own.

"Wait. How does it know what logo I want?" he asked.

"You just select it," I said.

"But, I mean, where do I get the new logo?" he asked.

"I emailed that to you already," I replied.

Jack was quiet for a moment while he stared at the screen.

"But... how do I get it from my email into the Word Document?" he asked.

You guys, he didn't know that he had to download the attachment to his hard drive before he could put it in the Word Document.

I think I have some long nights ahead of me.
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